Don't Wanna Miss A Thing
by SamanthaSavvy
Summary: Another song-fic. After Chapter 3 of New Moon, Edward's POV. The night of Bella's Birthday Party, Edward realizes there are choices he has to make to ensure Bella's safety. Kinda sad towards the end. Almost made me cry :P Anyways, enjoy, my loverlies :D


**Hiya, guys :D **

**Long time no see, I know. I've been busy... I got a lead in my school's musical "Oklahoma"! I was Aunt Eller, the "ol' womern" :P**

**Anyways, this here little piece is my first official Twilight ficcy. The only other one I've done was with a friend, and we barely got anything done. This is purely my idea, concocted from an Aerosmith song. I luff Aerosmith ^_^**

**The song is, "Don't Wanna Miss a Thing", represented in italics throughout the piece. The entire story is from Edward's POV.**

**Oh, and don't forget:**

**REVIEW!!!!!!**

**...pretty please?...**

**Enjoy :D**

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I sat watching my Bella sleeping, her chest rising and falling at a slow, gentle rhythm. If I could still feel drowsy and tired, this would have been a moment to drift away in my sweet lover's arms. Just the sight of her lying next to me, arms outstretched, hair splattered over the pillows, looking as gloriously beautiful as she did in that moment made my heart swell with pride, knowing she was mine. Mine to keep, to hold at night, to protect, to scare the monsters in her closet away.

_I could stay awake just to hear you breathing._

_Watch you smile while you are sleeping,_

_While you're far away and dreaming._

A piece of her soft hair fell in front of her face, blocking my view, and I quickly swiped it back into place. As I did so, my hand grazed along her skin and she shivered. My lips turned down into a scowl at the thought that I'd made my Bella shiver – in a bad way. If there was ever a time I still wished I was human, it was now. One of the setbacks to being immortal: your skin turned into ice – literally.

Nighttime had become my favorite time of day lately. It was when I could spend a few feeble hours lying next to Bella, watching her lightly toss and turn with sleep,smiling as she whispered my name over and over again. At times she'd call out for her mother or father, or any of our other nameless friends from school. Sometimes she'd even speak of Jacob Black, the boy from the Quileute Reservation, La Push. Whenever she did so, it irritated me to no end. Not to say I cared whether she thought about childhood friends, but Jacob's father, Billy, was on the Elder Council there in La Push, and he and the other elders did not like me and my family. They knew our secret, and they were opposed to us living in the area.

My thoughts lingered on the Black family. They didn't like me, especially Jacob. _Especially_ Jacob. Because I was with Bella, and he wanted her. My hands started shaking of their own accord and I had to concentrate to control my emotions in that moment. Something wasn't right. Not just with the idea of Jacob wanting Bella, but just the general atmosphere of this night. Something was off, peculiar, queer...

My train of thought was interrupted as Bella whispered my name, her breath tickling the hair on my forearm. I hadn't realized she'd been so close to me. I nonchalantly tucked her blanket back under her, trying to keep her warm. Though trying to warm Bella up with me in the bed was a lost cause in and of itself.

I lightly chuckled at my dry humor, absentmindedly running my fingers through her silky hair. It was almost dry. It'd been a few hours since she'd taken her shower, and with her tossing and turning, it was close to being completely dry. I leaned down and brushed my lips against her forehead.

_I could spend my life in this sweet surrender,_

_I could stay lost in this moment,_

_Forever..._

As I laid there content to be in this warm bed with my girlfriend – that still didn't seem the right title for her; our relationship was much too strong to call her my measly "girlfriend" - I let my mind wander on some of my favorite memories of her and I. There was the time in Port Angeles when I took her out to dinner, though I hated to think about why I'd been there in the first place... And then when I took her to the meadow that one Saturday morning. It'd taken almost 5 hours to get there, Bella and her clumsy feet. I smiled remembering everything about that day: the smell of her strawberry shampoo as the wind bristled through her hair, her gasp as I stepped out into the sunlight for the first time in front of her... My list of favorite memories kept growing as I realized I loved every time I was with her.

_Well every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure._

My fingers still running through her hair, I finally realized what had made this night stagnantly stale, not right. My hands froze midstroke, and my breathing hitched in my throat.

**Her birthday party.**

I still hadn't decided what to do after that horrific accident at my house the night before. My Bella had almost died by my own brother's hands, and I was to blame. I'd endangered her life by dragging her into a lifestyle filled with vampires. Eventually she would die because of it. If it wasn't an accident within the family like what happened yesterday, then it'd be another episode of tracking, another nomad vampire playing games. Or even me. Bella still wanted to try, to progress in our physical relationship. I knew it was risky. But I also knew I would give in eventually. And when that time came, it would end in a death sentence...

I shuddered involuntarily, picturing her perfect spine snapping in two as I tried to force myself into her fragile body... A helpless moan escaped my lips. There was only one thing I could do to ensure none of these possible scenarios came about: Leave. Forever.

_I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall asleep,_

_Cause I'd miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing._

My heart ached at the thought of losing my Bella, my soul, my only reason for existing. My tear ducts filled with venom, threatening to overflow onto the fabric of my shirt. Traitorous tears. If there was anyone who should've been brave in this moment, it was me. I was a vampire for crying out loud! But just the mere thought of never seeing her again caused those venom tears to roll down my cheeks and make a tiny splash onto my green sweater.

Even as my eyes filled with venom and salt, my mind still wandered into the idea of leaving her. I'd have to make it look like I was never here... **'It will** **be as if I never existed'**... I would have to thoroughly clean her house to make sure I left no physical evidence. But what would I be left with? The same as Bella – memories. Only the sweet memories of what we had for the few meager months we were together. If only vampires could sleep... My memories would fill my head with beautiful dreams of being with her again.

_Cause even if I'd dream of you, _

_The sweetest dream would never do._

_I'd still miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing._

As all these bitter thoughts ran through my head, my eyes wandered around Bella's room. I knew it by heart, having spent every night here for the past few months. I spied her CD Walkman on her bedside table. I leaned over her body and carefully, without making sound, snatched it off the table to me. I slid my thumb across the latch and the top slowly came up, showing the CD that was currently in her walkman. The title was in big bold letters, **Armageddon,** with the band name underneath, **Aerosmith**.

Curious to why Bella would listen to a 90's rock band – it was so unlike her – I slid the headphones over my ears and pressed play. The song she'd been listening to before she'd turned it off started up again, halfway through the song. I recognized the lyrics at once, shivering with a feeling of ironic coincidence...

_Lying close to you, feeling your heart beating,_

_And I'm wondering what you're dreaming,_

_Wondering if it's me you're seeing._

_Then I kiss your eyes, and thank God we're together._

_And I just wanna stay with you in this moment forever,_

_Forever and ever..._

The last two lines from the verse rang out in my head, over and over again, until the chorus came on...

_I don't wanna close my eyes,_

_I don't wanna fall asleep,_

_Cause I'd miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing._

_Cause even if I'd dream of you, _

_The sweetest dream would never do._

_I'd still miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing._

I quickly stabbed the stop button on the walkman, and almost threw the thing into the wall, it was driving me crazy. I scolded myself for being nosy of my girlfriend's music choices. So what if she wanted to listen to some stupid rock band like Aerosmith? I didn't care!

I slumped back down into the sheets on the bed, wishing I could still sleep, wishing I could fall into oblivion. I was so tired of thinking, that's all I ever did anymore. Just thought, thought, and thought some more. And when I wasn't thinking, I was listening to the inner thinkings of random passersby. What a life.

I glanced over at Bella again, watching her sleep. The song popped back into my head as I watched her chest rising and falling once more to a gentle rhythm. And as I watched her resting underneath the sheets that covered and warmed her tiny, fragile body, the notes slipped through my lips, and I was singing the rest of the song to my dear Bella.

"_I don't wanna miss one smile,_

_And I don't wanna miss one kiss._

_Well, I just wanna be with you, _

_Right here with you, just like this._

_I just wanna hold you close,_

_Feel your heart so close to mine,_

_And just stay here in this moment_

_For all the rest of time"_

My eyes once again filled with tears as I realized I would have to leave her. I couldn't keep endangering my dear Bella. I loved her too much to put her in constant danger. So this was it. My final night with her. No more spending time with her. I would have to tell the rest of the family to leave, so I could have the rest of the week to myself to prepare. I couldn't imagine my life without her, but this was the price for being a vampire, for being a monster...

And as I croaked out the last chorus of the song, I made a silent promise to Bella, a silent pact. I would never hurt her again. I would never put my love in danger once more. She would always have our precious memories to keep her company, to keep her whole.

"_I don't wanna close my eyes,_

_I don't wanna fall asleep,_

_Cause I'd miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing._

_Cause even if I'd dream of you, _

_The sweetest dream would never do._

_I'd still miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing."_

As I made that promise, I ended the song. Tears still dripping down my face, I leaned into Bella, giving her one last kiss, to hold onto and to cherish for the years to come.

I slipped out of the bed, and crept to the window. One last single tear poured down, and I turned once more to tell my Bella I loved her before I leapt out the window for the last time, running all the way back to my family. My life was officially coming to an end.

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